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Fashion fashion fashion. Is there anything else that matters?

vrijdag 30 juli 2010

Random Happy list

Things that make me happy:

* Finding a new book to read
* Finding a new blog to read
* Finding pretty pictures

* Having a nice/fun day at work
* Finishing something I had problems with
* Being told I did good on something

* Being in a cuddly mood
* Cuddling with my Hello Kitty Panda plushie
* Getting hugs when I'm in a cuddly mood

* The feeling I get after a nice shower
* The feeling I get when I lay in fresh bedsheets
* Even more so after I cleaned my room

* A nice/fun day with friends
* Knowing my friends care

* Having a nice dream
* Thinking about the nice dream all day

zondag 25 juli 2010

Being indecisive


Lately I've been finding it very hard to make decisions. I even tend to not make any decisions at all just because I'm very scared of making them.

As I am beginning to get quite sick of being so indecisive I wanted to write something about it. To find out the reason why I am being so indecisive and what I can do about it. Before writing this I actually did a little googling and thinking about this subject.

I think the most important question to ask about being indecisive is why?
Why am I being so indecisive? It's really easy to say "Just because I am" but there's always a reason behind it. It could be because one is insecure about the decision, or out of fear of the consequences and possible regret. It could also be because there are too many decisions to make, to many options or even to little information on the alternatives.

I found out it's really hard to find out the reason why you do the things you do. We tend to hide those things about ourselves. But when you want to work on things like this you'll have to get out of your safety zones and be honest about the real why's.

For me it's the fear of consequences and regret. Now that I've admitted that to myself, I can try and work out a way to make it easier to make decisions.

*The best way to fight indecisiveness is to be decisive.
Annoying as it might be its true. Avoiding decisions won't make them go away. It will only make them accumulate and it will only get harder the longer you wait. Writing them down helps. That way you can keep track of your decisions, the ones you've made and the ones you have yet to make.

*Don't rush into making decisions.
Take your time to make a decision. Don't make decisions under stress. You'll probably end up regretting it. Being impulsive might work for some, but it's important to put some thought in the decisions your making. Talk about it with other people to get there opinions on it, but don't let them push you into making a certain decision.

*Make sure you look into all the options.
Making a decision without having looked into all the options will most likely end up in regret as well. Write down all your options and cancel out the ones you decide against. That way you'll shorten the list of options and you'll know for sure you've put enough thought in it to be able to make the right decision for yourself. Don't over think it though, to much thinking can also lead to indecisiveness.

*What is the worst thing that could happen if you make this or that decision?
Now you don't want to think of doom scenarios that will very unlikely to happen. But think about it rationally. What IS the worst thing that could happen? If that where to happen, is it really that bad? Will it outweigh the good things of the decision you're going to make? And what about short term effect and long term effects? Really think about the pro's and con's of the decision you make and write those down. If the pro's outweigh the con's that might just be the right decision to make for yourself.

*Act out the decisions you've made.
If you're sure its the right decision to make then don't let others talk you out of de decisions you've made (unless your suicidal or wanting to hurt other people, then please do let others talk you out of it). If you're a really insecure person like me it's really easy to let others talk you out of things. But in the end you're most likely to regret it. And taking the same decision again will only by harder the second time around.

*Take responsibility.
This is probably the hardest part of making decisions. As with all things in life we have responsibilities we must take. Taking responsibilities for your decisions is just one of those things. Whether it turned out good or bad, we have to accept the consequences or the decisions we make.

Now unless we have to make decisions for a company, decision making is all about ourselves. We have to make a decision that feels right to us and that is right for us. You can't always prevent others from being hurt in your decision making. We should always try to hurt others as little as possible while making our decisions but sometimes it just can't be helped.

And those are today's thoughts of a little princess

zondag 18 juli 2010

Being jealous


Everybody gets jealous every now and then in various degrees, for various reasons. Some people get jealous of someone who has a cuter shirt, or at someone who gets better grades then they themselves do. Some get jealous over boyfriends or attention others get from certain people.

I think being unhappy or not liking or even not loving yourself is the biggest reason someone is jealous of someone else. Why else would we look at someone and dislike them for something we don't have ourselves.

A friend of mine wrote a little piece of advice someone gave her on her blog: "Being jealous, thinking negative, its all a safe place for is. Instead of becoming jealous, is it not better to think of that person as a role model? Instead of 'I want to be skinny as her' thinking 'she does a lot of dancing, I should copy her moves!'".

I think it's a really good advice and it really got me thinking. What do those people I'm jealous of do to get those things I'm jealous off? I've decided to make a list of all those things other people do to achieve those things I'm jealous of. Maybe I'll try to copy them, to see if i could achieve something quite like it. I might not become quite as good as them, But that won't be the point anymore then. The point would be doing something to achieve something I like. Or maybe I'll find out it's not worth the effort. If it means I have to do things against my believes, or even something that damages me or the people around me, it's just not worth becoming something like them.

Like I said, I think being unhappy about yourself is the main reason we get jealous. So in order to stop being jealous, we should start liking ourselves more. We should start being happy about ourselves and proud of what we already have. Maybe we will even realize we have a lot more then we thought, maybe even have something we where jealous off to begin with.

So I'm making a list about what is good about me and what other people could envy about me! I've never thought about it much before. But I have good qualities just as much as everyone else does. Up until now I've only seen my own faults and what I don't have. I didn't see what made me special.

I'm going to sit in frond of the mirror and write down the things i like about my face, my hair and my body and I'm going to be proud of it. I'm going to think about what I'm good at and about what I achieved so far and I'm going to be proud of it. I'm going to think about all my good habits and character treats. And I'm going to be so very much proud of it all, there'll hardly be any reason to be jealous anymore, at all.

And these are today's thoughts of a little princess,

Chibi Ohimesama

maandag 12 juli 2010

Trying to find myself.

Hello there,

I think, one is always trying to find oneself, or an aspect of oneself.
And as so many others, I too, am trying to find myself. Its a hard journey with a lot of scary and sad events, but luckily there are also funny and happy events.

Theres a lot of falling down. But for each falling down theres a standing up and getting stronger if your willing to learn from your mistakes. I always find falling down on my road of life the scariest thing. More then once I'm afraid to get up because if I get up, I can fall again. There have been moments I was so afraid of falling down that I didn't even try to get up anymore. Though now I'm just a tad wiser then I was before. And I discovered falling down isn't quite as bad as I thought it might be. Because not getting up and not moving on is even scarier then falling down. The longer you wait to get up, the harder it gets.

Theres a lot of learning, too. Learning from your mistakes and learning by listening to other people and there mistakes. Learning from books, learning from the Internet (it really did open a whole new world of learning for us) learning from our elders and learning from our youngsters.

An important lesson I have learned is that it is very important to listen to everything you hear and look at everything you see. There could always be something interesting in each and every event or conversation or happening we encounter. Of course it is our own decision which information we use, which information we will store away for later use and which information isn't of importance to us.

An other important lesson I learned is to always be true to oneself. Finding oneself means trying to find that which makes you you. Not trying to find what others think that makes you you.
I lied a lot to myself (and others) to mold me to other peoples wishes, even if it went against my believes. I've tried to forget and I've tried to act out parts. And I have done so many other things just to be part of a group. All in all it was just an other lesson to be learned. Cause now I know the true importance of really being true to yourself no matter what others think of it. In the end you are the only thing that will always be with you all your life.

I have got my interest in Lolita back, I've got a book addiction I'm finally proud of and I'm trying to read into everything that I find interesting, even if its a tad weird, because I like to do so. I'm no longer trying to be what others tell me to be with all my might and I'm trying to embrace every learning experience given to me (even if there still scary to experience sometimes).

And these are todays thoughts of a little princess,

Chibi Ohimesama