Need for study....

Hello my Dears,

I want to start with a happy note: I PASSED MY JAPANESE SPEAKING RETAKE (and I seriously have no idea how). I'm super happy :D because this means I still have a chance. I'm on my way to my 4th blok period tests now. So I got 4 more Japanese tests to go. Which means that I have to study like hell!!

There are a lot of things I need to do: I need to study English, I need to study Japanese cultural knowledge and I need to study every aspect of the Japanese language we have had up until now. So that means I have to study Japanese grammar, Japanese Kanji, Japanese listening, and Japanese speaking. Thats a lot of studying, believe me on that.
I only have a few more days for everything, and I'm kinda freaking out. Okay, I'm really freaking out. I'm really glad I have my Japanese speaking test 2 weeks from now, instead of coming week. So I have more time for that. But I really just want to pass it all.

I really want to become a second year student. I want to have cute little kohai (students of a lower grade then me), and just really get to my goal! I want to stay and have fun with everybody, and feel like I'm finally doing what I like! Which is this study!!

But sadly, I get distracted really fast -I am, after all, typing this blog entry instead of studying, aren't I?- so I have to get rid of my distractions. How am I going to do this??? I'm going to cancel my number one distraction: The Internet.

After I finished this post, I'm going to exit my browser. So that means:
- No more facebook
- No more tumblr
- No more twitter
- No more blogging (after this one)
- Lots and lots of studying
- Small little fun breaks in between, but only when I finished a subject. And no longer then 10 to 20 minutes
- 2 or 3 big breaks of 30 to 60 minutes MAX

And I am going to try my absolute best!! I WILL become a second year student of the Japanese language!!

Please with me luck, cheer me on, and I will come back to you after my tests are over to update you on the end results!

Love you guys!!

Until next time

10/20/30 Day Challenge Idea.

Hello my Dears~

Have you missed me? I've been busy with my studies these past few days (and I still need to keep going) but I took this little moment to write out an idea I have. I got this idea while reading a Magazine article.

As some of you might know, I'm currently looking for myself. I'm not really sure what I want to become, or who I am. I know I want to keep studying Japanese, and I want to do something with my love for fashion. Lately I have also become very interested in writing, blogging and magazines. But I'm really not sure what to do with all of it!!

The other day, when I was riding the train back home, I was reading a magazine we probably all know: Glamour. There was this one article about "Coming out of the closet". Normally this phrase is used for homosexuals who hide they're sexuality or who do not know for sure. But Glamour used it for hiding what you wanted to be/do, or not knowing what you wanted to be/do, Jobwise. It was a really interesting article. (If you live in Holland or Belgium and you want to read it: Buy the Juli 2011 Glamour edition.)

Now for the part that inspired me for the 10/20/30 Day Challenge: Glamour always used these little side boxes with extra information. With this article they also had a side box with extra information about how to find out what your ideal choice for work was. And it is actually really simple! I'll try to translate the extra information for a bit (I do hope thats legal, haha)

What does your ideal day look like?
How do you figure out what your ideal work choice is? Try walking your ideal work(day) through. Live that day as if it where the present, in detail, from the moment you wake up, until the moment you go to bed. Write it down if you think thats easier. The following questions might give you a hand: What is the first thing you do when you wake up? What do you eat for breakfast? Do you prepare it yourself, or does someone bring it to you, along with a rose and a newspaper. What cloths will you wear? Try to think about every part of the day: Are you inside or outside, calm or active, alone or with other people. Try to keep 3 things in mind when you run through your ideal day: WHAT kind of things do you do? It doesn't matter if you do not have the skills yet, you are daydreaming, after all. WHERE are you, in which situation, on which location? And with WHOM do you work, laugh or talk? It does not have to be people you personally know, famous people or imaginary ideal employee are okay as well. This way it will become clear, for example, if you are a teamperson or an Einzelgänger, if you are somebody who wants to take there time working on a big/long project or if you are somebody who needs variation and change.
(source: Glamour Dutch edition Juli 2011)

And thats my idea for the 10/20/30 Day Challenge: To write out my ideal (work) day for 10/20/30 days!!! And I call it: What does your idea day look like 10/20/30 day challenge! This will help me get an idea of what I want to do, whom I want to be, where I want to be. I will try to do this, coming summer. It will give me a good idea what I want to do with my studies if I pass, and it will give me a good idea what I need to look for when I don't pass my upcoming exams (but of course I'm counting on the pass!!!!). I made it a 10/20/30 Day Challenge because I have no idea how many days I can keep it up, but I want to keep it up for 10 days at least! I will probably post the stories on this blog (it will give you some inspiration to do it yourself, and some entertainment to read when your bored, haha). I will post it under the tag: What does your idea day look like 10/20/30 day challenge.

If you do this challenge yourself: Please let me know!! Let me know the end results, or if you post it on your blog, I want to read the stories you come up with! Inspire each other, so to say.
If you take this challenge: Good luck, and lets try our best to figure out what we want to do, so we can become happy!

I will keep you updated!

Love you! Until next time!

(picture source: Tumbler, so no clue xD)

Another Quick update!

Hello my Dears,

Just a quick update today!
I bought a curl iron for my new haircut. I saw all these cute messy curl hairdo's for short hair, and I wanted to try it out. But I needed a curl iron for that, and I didn't have one yet. A curl iron has been on my want-list for ages, so this week I finally got one!
This is the end result:

I know all my facebook followers already saw it, but... It's so super cute I just wanted to show it in my blog, as well!

Lets see. One more week until I have to do my retake on Japanese speaking. I'm super nervous about it. I really don't know if I can make it, but I'm going to do my best!! Really I am!
I have been listening to our Japanese listening CD every moment I'm pretty much doing nothing. I'm even listening at it as I'm typing this! I'm listening to the grammar and I'm trying to translate it, sort of.

After next week I also have my new exams. Once again I have Japanese speaking, Japanese Listening, Japanese writing and Japanese reading. I'm not as confident about these exams as I have been about the last ones. I feel like I didn't do enough to be able to pas them. Even though I actually have been doing quite a bit if I think really hard on it. But I'm going to study super hard! I already decided to put even more time in my studies. Maybe even get a little less sleep every other day or so, and drink coffee. Well, drinking coffee is something I actually like, but normally don't do because it keeps me awake if I drink it after 2 PM or so.

I really really really hope I pass my exams. I really want to stay and learn more, to become a PR person in a Japanese fashion magazine or brand. That would be so cool!

aah. Did I mention I bough sneakers? I don't think I did. Here they are!

I know it isn't the prettiest picture but, these are my new babies. They are a bit hot for summer weather but they are so pretty! And comfi! I'm planning on getting new summer shoes as well. But I haven't found my perfect pair yet. I will keep looking, when I have time, besides studying, haha.

I think that is my update for now. I will keep my dear readers (you) updated about my exams the coming period, and the results, of course! Please wish me luck!!

Until next time, my dears!

Just a down day rant....

Hello my dears,

Today I'm having a bit of a down feeling. So I'm going to rant for a bit. Its pretty much a bullshit rant, I don't even know why I'm posting it, and I might take it down in a few days.

My day started out pretty well. I had a bit of a problem getting up, which isn't really all that normal for me, but hey, it happens. I actually had a small headache but I know thats because of the stress I'm having now (stress makes me clench my teeth together in my sleep, so my jaw hurts, which makes my teeth and my head hurt).
I dolled myself up cutely, I took the time to curl my hair and put on a cute dress.

And thats how I started my day!

At school.. It kind of started going down hill. For some reason I was already not feeling completely happy. Not depressed but, not happy either. Normally we (our class) meet in the canteen and walk to the classroom together. If someone stays behind, there is bound to be at least one person waiting for that person. But, as you may have guessed at this point, I stayed behind and no one waited for me. I know they probably didn't mean anything by it, but I got a fear for being left behind/left out/left alone. So I tried to keep calm and tell myself that they didn't mean anything by it, they just didn't notice me staying behind.
I walked to some of my other classmates, they where standing outside, smoking, and joined them to walk to the classroom.

Class was... sort of okay... I'm having more and more trouble actually remembering all the things we are told. And while I don't forget it fully, its worrying me. It is only 1.5 more weeks until our final exams! And that is where my stress comes from pretty much. I'm super afraid I'll fail. I don't want to leave this school, or my new friends! And I love the idea of becoming a PR person in a Japanese fashion company! (its my goal!!!)

After class I guess my day went down hill. And.. right now m just.... I don't know what I want anymore. I still really really really want to continue with my current study but, I'm starting to feel I'm powerless in what I want. No matter how hard I try I don't seem to be making any progress.

My therapist (yes, once again, I go to a therapist and I'm not ashamed of it.) said that I'm turning my frustration for myself into frustration for other people, and I guess he's right. I started gossiping, already some time ago, but today I actually got hurt by the things I said. I pretty much hate myself for it now. I guess you could say, I finally realized what I was doing.

.. m not even sure why I'm writing this...I might take this down after a few days, who knows...

I would wanna write more, but I don't really want to become much more personal then this at the moment so~..

Bai

Do it my way: Keeping a white skin!

Hello my Dears,

How are you all doing?? Enjoying the nice weather??
In Holland we have had super nice weather the past few days. A lot of sun, little rain, 20C and up. Perfect summer weather! I have been enjoying it as well, although I have mostly enjoyed it inside, with the window wide open. And when I went out, I wore a summer coat, factor 50 sunblock and sunglasses!

Why? Well, because I want to keep my skin white, of course! Now I know the ideal in our western countries is currently a sun tanned skin, but I love my white skin. It is actually what I think is most beautiful. And I mean white, not pale. I mean what kind of fashion would it be if you looked sick?

An other reason why I try to keep my skin white, is because the UV rays age your skin and, eventually, can cause skin cancer. Not something I really want so~ I just try to do my best to take care of my skin.

Tips to keep a white skin can be found all over the internet and in magazines. You can actually find more every year. Mom told me last year, that there had been a Australian researcher on the radio who said that white skin should actually be the Fashion Ideal. In Australia it already was (thats what my mom said, I wouldn't know). He predicted that white skin would eventually become a fashion ideal, again. Because white skin would equal a healthy skin! I can't wait for that to happen!!

Well, most of these "Keep your skin white" tips are already known, but I'm going to put them in a little list anyways.

Wear sunblock. Not just when you go tanning, but also when you go outside to shop, or bike or whatever. Your daycream might say it has a UV blocker, but you'd have to put your whole bottle on your face to get even just a little bit of sun protection. Sunblock is cheaper and works better.
Now I use a factor 50, because I burn really fast and I want to stay white. The difference between the factors gets smaller the higher the factor goes. So don't buy factor 90 or 100, it has almost no difference from factor 50. Unless you are talking about the price difference.
Don't use to little sunblock, reapply after about 2 hour and cover every part of your body thats not covert by your cloths or shoes!!

Wear sunglasses Not only do they protect your eyes from the sun (and the UV), when you wear sunglasses you don't have to squeeze your eyes together to see things. And squeezing your eyes gives you wrinkles! Something we don't really like, now do we?
The nice part about sunglasses is that they can be super cute! I actually have 2 pair of sunglasses right now. And they look so good on me! Theres a new sunglass fashion every year. So time to start a sunglass collection besides your shoes and bags collection!

Wear sun protection on your lips! This is actually something a lot of people forget (me including). You can get special lip balsams that protect against UV!

Wear a cute, sun blocking hat This year hats actually got back into fashion! Fashion and sun blocking in one! perfect!!

Try to stay out of the sun between 11 am and 3 pm These are the times when the sun is at its meanest. If you have to go into the sun, wear long sleeves (white reflects light and heat), try to wear a hat and don't forget your sunblock~!!

Well thats about it. Of course there are a lot more things to think to protect your skin. But these are pretty much the basics.

I wish you all a super nice summer, lots of fun and a healthy skin.

Love, Me.

(Picture source)